Craig J. Hansen

Facebook RSS Feed Contact

Superpowers

darthvader-screengrab


Question: Isn’t it true that if you lose your sight, you develop other senses that are especially strong? That nature compensates?

Answer: Yes, you develop superpowers. Now, I can become invisible to myself. I can walk into solid objects. I am waiting for other superpowers to develop. I want to fly. It would be a lot easier than arranging transportation, which is time-consuming and complicated. I want to stand on my front steps and soar up into the air and arrive at work. As this winter is particularly cold, I worry about wind chill while flying. Not much advantage in flying if you arrive at your destination frozen dead.

I would also like to be able to read minds, just because it would be nice to be able to read something again. This would have to be a carefully regulated activity, as I have very little interest in knowing what goes on in other people’s minds. In fact, I think it would be quite disturbing.

Do you actually develop better senses as a kind of compensation? The answer is no. You might depend on your hearing more, but your hearing is no better. You are who you are, only with bad eyes. And it’s kind of a waste, as your visual cortex consumes a lot of your brainpower and, who knows, maybe this actually is re-purposed. In my case, my visual cortex soldiers on, taking in limited input and trying to make useful suggestions to the rest of me. Indeed, I have explained to my eyes that we are a team, and we are only as strong as the weakest member.

“You have to pick it up,” I tell them. “The rest of us depend on you and you are not doing your only job. Other parts have to multitask, but your task is simple, direct, and important. But don’t get a big head. Everyone is important, in their way. And when I think about how we protected you, nourished you – is this how you repay us?”

I don’t know if these guilt-based pep talks work. I suppose my eyes might be worse if we didn’t talk. And I want an honest relationship.

But the superpower I really want is that indefinable sixth sense. For Spiderman, it’s Spidey sense. It enables martial arts guys to defeat their enemies while blindfolded. Maybe it’s The Force. I don’t know. After all, it’s a sixth sense, and I barely have five.

But back to reality and accommodation and adjustment.

Wait, I think I just heard a squirrel blink two blocks away. I’ll fly over and see what’s up.

Copyright 2015 by Craig J. Hansen